Talking to people means communicating your ideas and exchanging views with them. So to be able to negotiate meaning with these people, you should be aware of the best ways of using language items and how to choose the ones that are appropriate for each situation. In this lesson, we will focus on expressing agreement and disagreement. We will try to provide a comprehensive list of expressions used in both cases in response to somebody’s opinion.
But before listing these expressions, we should first make sure that we understand what is exactly meant by agreeing and disagreeing, and how to agree or disagree with people in a more acceptable and respectful way. Otherwise, we will risk destroying our relationships with others, who can be our closest friends, relatives workmates, etc.
The word agreement designates a state in which you share the same opinion with another person. That is, you and that person have come to a harmonious arrangement over a particular issue or idea.
Disagreement, on the other hand, refers to a state in which your view is not the same as that of your partner. This means that your opinions are sometimes different, incompatible, or even controversial.
Having stated the difference between agreeing and disagreeing, let’s go through the expressions used in each situation.
Ways of expressing agreement and disagreement
| Expressions of agreeing | Expressions of disagreeing |
| I agree with you. | I don’t agree with you. |
| That’s true. | I disagree with you. |
| That’s O.K. | That’s not true. |
| That’s right. | That’s not O.K. |
| We have the same views. | That’s not right. |
| We share the same opinion. | We don’t have the same views. |
| That’s how I see it. | We don’t share the same opinion. |
| That’s how I feel. | That’s not how I see it. |
| I think so. | That’s not how I feel. |
| I guess so. | I don’t think so. |
| I suppose so. | I don’t suppose so. |
| We are on the same boat. | We are not on the same boat. |
Tips about how to negotiate meaning with people
It is very important here to note that we shouldn’t only learn how to agree and disagree with our partners, but also how to do it respectfully so as not to hurt them and destroy the good relationship with them that we might have spent months or years building.
To do so, it is recommended to follow the instructions listed below when you want to tell someone that you don’t agree with him:
- Give priority to logic over emotions. That is, try to be more objective than subjective. You can reach this skill by defending your opinions and providing solid arguments that support them, instead of defending yourself.
- Be positive, not negative. This means that you should not only be chasing your partner’s errors and “bombard” him with your ideas whenever you see there is an opportunity for that. Rather, try to search for anything positive in his views, praise him for that, and show him that you give high value to everything he says even if that may sound wrong to you. Always remember that “What you say is false but can be true, and what I say is true but can be false.”
- Listen more and speak less. The more you listen, the more value you give to your partner. Listening to people makes them feel that what they say is important. Besides, when you rush to respond to someone’s opinion, you may miss something right and fruitful which was going to appear at the end of the conversation.
- Focus on your partner’s ideas, not personality. We should always remember that the topic of discussion in any conversation is ideas, not the person who says them. Sometimes, we tend to shift from discussing ideas to discussing the people who produce these ideas just because we think they are wrong. This is a strategic mistake we often make when exchanging views with others. Never evaluate people, evaluate what they say.
In sum, disagreement is always there, but there is also a wrong and a right way of disagreeing with people and presenting your arguments effectively and respectfully.
Exercise about agreeing and disagreeing
Respond to the following situations as required
- Linda: I think watching videos is better than reading books. You: …………………………………………………. (Express disagreement)
- William: In my opinion, buying things offline is more secure than online. You: …………………………………………………. (Express agreement)
- Jennifer: For me, trading smuggled products is illegal. It should be avoided. You: ………………………………………………… (Express agreement)
- Richard: As for me, opening a snack to sell hamburgers is the only way to make money and fix our financial problems. You: ……………………………………………….. (Express disagreement)
- Barbara: To my mind, sharing our project on Facebook will make us very famous people. You: ……………………………………………….. (Express disagreement)
- Susan: I believe that sharing your problems with our friends will help us fix them. You: ………………………………………………. (Express agreement)
- Elizabeth: As I see it, buying from supermarkets is better than buying from corner shops. You: …………………………………………….. (Express disagreement)
- Joseph: It is a good thing to use online dictionaries. This is how I see it. You: …………………………………………… (Express agreement)
- Karen: I feel that learning foreign languages can benefit you a lot, especially in finding jobs. You: …………………………………………… (Express agreement)
- Sarah: It seems to me that growing pets at home is a good alternative to looking for new friends. You: ………………………………………….. (Express disagreement)
